Style & body confidence

By JOY ABODERIN, Personal Stylist

 

Whether you’re a new mum, experiencing the menopause, or postmenopausal, your body is constantly changing as a woman. I’ve had the privilege of working with over 8,000 women, helping them to feel body confident and love who they are. Learning to truly embrace who you are today means you celebrate your quirks, body changes, and gracefully love the woman you are now. 

You, too, deserve to love yourself for all you’ve been through and your body for carrying you through it all. These are my three guiding principles to help you get there…

 

Start with joyful colours

If I could find Joseph’s Technicolour coat, I’d put it on every single woman. Knowing and wearing your best colours not only gives you an effervescent glow, but it also transforms your mindset and elevates joy. If you don’t know your best colours, have your colours analysed - choosing the right colours will make you feel alive.

 

Ditch the comparison

It’s true that comparison is the thief of joy, but it runs a lot deeper than that. It robs you of the present and makes you live in the past or, worse, in another person’s world. 

As your body changes from puberty through to menopause, so too should your mindset and wardrobe. Living and embracing who you are now matters. 

This means ditching:

• Comparing yourself to your friend, whose metabolism and body shape are different to yours
  

• Scrolling through social media and comparing yourself to celebrities whose lifestyles are miles apart from yours
  

• Comparing yourself to who you were 20 years ago.

When you move to self-acceptance, clothes will become exciting again!

 

 Know your body, love your body

You may move house, you may even relocate to a new country, but your body is the only home you live in permanently. Learning your body shape is the key to loving it:

• Work with your body, not against it. Choose looser fabrics like silk and go for solid straps if you feel your arms are not as firm as they used to be.

• Wear breathable, fluid fabrics to enhance body confidence, especially if you’re perimenopausal or menopausal. Choose cotton, bamboo, wool or silk. 

• If you’re fuller in the bust, keep your neckline lower. V-neck or round-neck tops are flattering on your décolletage.

• If you have wider hips, select wide-leg jeans and trousers to balance out your proportions beautifully.

• If you’re petite (under 5ft 4in), wearing knee-length or above dresses and skirts is superb on your proportions.

• If you’re tall (over 5ft 8in), experiment with colour blocking.

Finally, releasing what is familiar can be hard and often emotional. Consider a wardrobe detox - you can let go of the old and fully accept who you are right now because the you today matters the most.

Joy Aboderin is the Founder of Potential U, a style consultancy that aims to help women feel totally confident in their own skin. Enjoy more of her advice and content on Instagram and LinkedIn.